day one. news received..mind silent..very still...no reaction.. yet...slowly, by the hour, time ticking away, sinking feeling creeps..justifications, reproachful words, appeasements...dialogues keep swarming round and round the head..u want to talk and not just to the voices in the head. talk to to the perpectuator...an old belief...sharing stuff lightens teh load...and sharing it with the person who gives u the load..tht works faster and better.

talks...person doesnt seem to think panic button is warranted...nothing has changed, nothing will..... a brave declaration indeed.. experience says the declaration wont stand test of time.. butego/ mind is grateful for the patient hearing.. mind is smewat quelled.

day two: morning is fine...later mind is shaky again...missing missing feeling...but no panic thank god.. talk about it again to somebody else.. a frank question...didnt u expect it? then why the sorrow?

true...why the sorrow? mind is more at peace.

suddenly a new thought...was the brave declaration just a face saving exit line? just a way to redeem oneself in one' own eyes?

day three:this one is gone but u can prevent it happening again....tag line of a tooth paste... all already in the room are welcome, but doors closed from now here on.

day four: no hardly remember the inccident at all

day five..wht was it all about "wonders*..must admit finds some satisfacation in checking if the lights are red or green